Monday, June 30, 2008
Because of these emotions, I keep ignoring or give her attitude.
I feel like asshole, whenever i not happy i keep doing tat
Always make her unhappy and angry.
I am crazy.
I not even worthy for her.
I just bastard who can't make things better for her and keep giving her more problems only.
the memories will turn WILD.
6/30/2008 11:09:00 PM
i am a screwed up guy
I really have enough of it already!
CAN SOMEONE JUST GIVE ME A EARPLUG AND STUFF IT INTO MY EARS!?
It super hurting and pain to hear people say like
"They 2 come in pair, come together leave together"
"Where they 2? What happen to them?"
"Since they 2 outside? Why don't we ps them and let them have sweet time together?"
"Why 2 always like that the are?"
"Why they always together?"
.... and many more.
Almost everyday i been hearing all these.
IT REALLY HURT ME ALOT AND I FEEL VERY PAIN WHEN I KEEP HEARING THIS.
SOMETIME I JUST WANT TO CRY BUT I CANT.
I MUST KEEP CONTROL CONTROL CONTROL IT
I always try to ignore it.
BUT HOW LONG CAN I HOLD?
I know some of u will think that I very stupid or weird
because me and her are not together but I so affected by this stuff.
And I didn't dare tell many people about this because i dun wan people to know that she is involved.
So i always act like there nothing happen between us.
And keep on go against my heart.
I can't follow my heart at all.
Seriously what wrong with me?
I always like angry?
Or keep giving attitude to people?
Making people unhappy?
No proper time management?
Yes, i am very selfish. I AM JUST A GUY WHO EASILY JEALOUS
THAT IT!!
Simply i am screwed
the memories will turn WILD.
6/30/2008 09:30:00 PM
Monday, June 2, 2008
Sometime how I hope life can be easy as abc.
Sorry the world is cruel...
Even you work hard for it,
Thing always don't go the way you want.
Sometime I wish I can understand more about myself.
What do I really want?
Why I always contradicting myself?
In quiet night like this...
How I wish I will be crying now
But I can't
Why?
After all, I am a very scary person
the memories will turn WILD.
6/02/2008 01:52:00 AM
Sunday, June 1, 2008
I have decided
I learned many weakness about myself and I not going to let it be as it is!
I going try to improve in my communications skills and stop being so naggy (like my father)
Control my emotion
And stop being so jealous over small things
I need try speak clearly once again.
Be more open and do more sport.
As for my heart, I have decided.
Maybe I'm not really ready for love after all.
So I decided to end this matter asap.
If I continue on, I think I will be like a irritatant.
the memories will turn WILD.
6/01/2008 03:46:00 AM
